03 aug 06 - 18 aug 06
"What does a carrot stuck through the middle of a potato look like after 1 month of haning in the back window of your car"
18 aug 06
it was beyond my wildest dreams and aspirations.
immediately after i returned from my two week oregon trip, i checked on the potato-carrot-string-duct tape structure, and didn't see much obvious change since august 3rd. so, i provided an update here (today's update replaces it), stating that i would continue to let the thing hang for the full month, and report back then. (un)fortunately, the potato had grown so soft that its supending string cut right through it yesterday, after it was extensively bashed about the rear window during delivery driving.
furthermore, i discovered that it had landed on my backseat, leaking rotten potato guts on my spare batteries.
after letting it sit for a night (no light for photography), today i took the former potato in hand, and realized that the true extent of the horror had been concealed by the potato's tough skin, which is made of cellulose and doesn't rot. so, i held the thing up at arm's length above my head, and let it drop to the pavement. it broke in half on impact.
i needn't mention the smell, but i will anyway. it should have tipped me off that more decomposition had taken place than was visable, because every time i'd get in my car, it smelled like hell breaking open. but, a few seconds of open windows made me forget about it. i'm sort of used to foul-smelling cars, being a man of questionable hygiene even under normal circumstances.
but the best part, the coup-de-grace, was that upon closer examination of the rotten liquified guts, i discovered that they were absolutely crawling with maggots. truly, things could not have turned out better.
i gathered all of the parts (potato as it were, carrot as it were, duct tape-and-string assembly), and put them into the rather ineffective pot i'd placed underneath to catch leakage.
i took it all inside, threw it away, and immediately put the bag out in the backyard trashcan. then, i attacked the inside of my car with knife to scrape up dried bits, water, paper towels and a bottle of "formula 409". the windows are open, and i hope that permanent fragrance-damage hasn't been done. it would have been fun to go on a date while the potato was hanging in the rear window. i had to explain it to my manager; i said it was "an experiment", which is true. i could have just as easily called it an art project. funny how either term can be used to explain almost any instance of bizarre behavior.
03 aug 06
this submitter is now my best friend.
i'm in a great position to answer this question, because i'm leaving tomorrow for a camping trip; this object can hang from my rear window for the two weeks i'll be gone. it won't hang for a month, because i'm going to have to start driving as soon as i come back, and i understand that "rotting potato" is up there among the foulest smells on earth, but i think two weeks should satisfy. really, this submission enjoyed perfect timing.
i visited the grocery store today and bought a potato and a carrot. then, i gathered the necessary supplies: potato, carrot, string, and duct tape, plus a knife to bore a hole in the potato.
i cut a tunnel through the potato, and fed a loop of string through, tying it to itself. the potato was now suspendable. next, i jammed the carrot into the hole. i had carved the hole to an ideal size, and the carrot squeezed in tight.
finally, i ran the free end of the string through the crack between the hatchback and roof of my car, and duct-taped that end to the roof. there is now a superstructure dangling securely in my rear window, precisely to the asker's specifications.
there it will hang, for two weeks. per a friend's suggestion i put a bucket underneath, because apparently rotting potato liquifies, and i don't want to get it on my seats.
stay tuned -- results on or around august 16th.