Ask the Box

25 sep 06

"What are the odds of you getting retarded pussy at MC?"

slim. she'd have to be profoundly retarded to be tricked into romance, far past the point of required institutionalization, and approaching the point of "feeding tube".

i'm picky. a lot of people get incensed when i say "i'm picky", because they say "well, look at you! you can't afford to be picky!" i don't mind being alone, and could only be persuaded to emerge from my cocoon of pizza delivery, pointless web programming classes, the internet, and 7-11 jamaican beef patties with The Perfect Girl. i hesitate to say "woman", because those generally expect you to fertilize them and owe the bank $300,000.

when i hit my late twenties, i was sort of shocked that almost all of my friends got married, right on schedule -- it was like they were on a clock or something. and, i suppose they were, species-perpetuation-wise. it's suspicious that everyone, when they hit their late 20s, suddenly exclaims, regarding whomever they happen to be dating at the time, "oh, i've found that special someone!" but i suppose if it feels special, then it is -- it's ok that biology and culture trump intellect and ideal, if the end result is a happier person. but i wonder if some people would prefer to stay single, and only get married because there's pressure to do so. nah -- i think it's mostly that humans are like lemmings leaping off the cliff: they can't help but seek out a lifetime sex partner, and aren't quite sure what to make of aging bachelors and spinsters.

some chick would have to come along who looked like #3, was as sane as #2, and was as mind-compatible as #1, in order for me to take interest. but maybe this all is just an excuse to remain undatable, which i readily enjoy (gluttony, sloth, general solipsism).

why do some want me to get married? people at work think it's weird that i'm not married or don't have a "girlfriend". most of my friends accept it, but there are a few who are still puzzled. i guess it must not be as important to me as it is to other people to feel connected to others, or to a single other.

but now that you mention it, mr. gor, i did immediately notice the girls on the MC campus. there are a lot of them. more than i've seen in years. all concentrated into one area.

maybe i'll try "dating" someday, but i'm not sure i'd like it. i'm pretty sure i wouldn't, actually -- going on a date is very much like a job interview. in fact, the parallels are quite unsettling: