I'm tired. My sleep schedule seems to be permanently messed up. One thing that would help it would be exercise, but it's unbearably hot outside. I think it's time to move.
Before I forget, I need to blog about time being part of the illusive nature of what we call reality. I derived the knowledge that time is an illusion from determinism: if everything is predetermined by the interdependent structure of all other things (which are ultimately, by the natural conclusion of this interdependence, not separate things at all but rather all part of the same subject), then time cannot exist -- in a sense, everything has already 'happened,' because the result of what we call every probable outcome has been determined by 'pre'-existing conditions.
A related concept is that of the past and future being illusions; if one had to assign a temporal name to all that exists, one would have to assign 'present.' this fits in with observable qualities of time, existance, and consiousness: the future and the past don't exist except in our own minds -- all that is, all that can be, is the present.
Time not existing is a clear derivation to make from determinism, but I know I'm not going to convince a lot of people on determinism because they are so absolutely sold on free will, which is a belief and component of world-view something like religion or politics in it sacredness. In fact, the notion of free will is essential to the philosophical basis of both the abrahamic religious tradition and american capitalism. So, I'm largely falling on deaf ears here when I posit that there's no such thing as 'free will.' every thing that 'happens' (a better way to say it, since I've established that time doesn't exist, might be 'everything that is') only 'happens' because a 'pre'-existing pattern of causal agents made that thing 'happen.'
These things are very difficult to talk about with language (hence, all of the scare quotes whenever I encounter a time-dependent word), since our system of thought is tied so closely to illusive linear time. For instance, every time I use a sentence like 'has been determined,' I may be confounding the reality I'm seeking to illuminate, because I'm implying that the past exists. Perhaps the best way to sum it all up is with the statement 'everything is,' and leave it at that.
On a related note, here are some criticisms of eastern buddhism.
I think the resolution of these conflicts comes in realizing that they aren't conflicts at all, and that the idea of opposing 'points' or using logical tools to understand reality is a western idea that doesn't fit well with eastern concepts of reality. Even to call it a concept is problematic, because that implies understanding with the mind -- perhaps these things are much more readily explainable in other languages. English is a very logical and precise tongue, which is good for talking about computers but perhaps not so good for illuminating the nature of god.
Also, the resolutions to my criticisms are seen more readily by looking at hindu tradition, from which buddhism grew. Things like the four noble truths, the concept of life as suffering, and the eightfold path are tools, similar to the hindu 'gods' -- vehicles, for experiencing brahman, or ultimate reality. Attaining the right path is a tool, rather than an end unto itself. Buddha was talking to humans, and not addressing ultimate reality, and so needed to present some workable method for enlightenment. We're the ones who have to understand it (although utimately, to distinguish between us and ultimate reality is meaningless), and the logic in our brains needs to be given some tools so that it might have a better chance of defeating itself.
The word 'god' comes from the indo-european root 'gheu,' which means 'to call or invoke,' or in its oldest form, 'becoming.' the hebrew tetragrammaton YHWH translates into 'i am that I am.' central to these concepts it the notion of being -- of something simply existing. A lot of new-age spiritual tradition uses the word 'being' as it's way of describing ultimate reality, as a substitute term for 'god,' which has had its meaning coopted by yahweh, allah and jesus. As you've probably noticed, I prefer 'ultimate reality' as a way of describing ultimate reality. Alternatively, I'll use the phrase 'the one true nature of reality,' because this carries along with it the important concept that everything is one, that to make distinctions between two different things is a form of insanity. Speaking of insanity, there's another one: sanity, or perfect sanity. This implies the true grasp of reality, something that most of us don't see, won't see, can't see, etc.
I have a lot of blogs that I never posted. I should start dealing with them now, so they don't accumulate any further, even if they seem somewhat stupid to me now. Maybe someone will enjoy reading them.
I've heard things about girls becoming more receptive when they know someone is not single -- I suppose having a girlfriend it's like passing a qualifying exam and wearing the certificate pinned to your chest.
If one has a girlfriend, one doesn't have any burning desire for 'a girlfriend, per se. 'just wanting someone' is not a very attractive quality to exhibit, and tends to drive girls away.
I know it's a cliche, but I'm afraid it's true: you find a girl when you're not looking for one.
Of course it goes both ways -- I wouldn't want to date a girl who explicitly 'just wanted a boyfriend.' I would prefer her to be cool headed and objective, and find me interesting. I wouldn't want to fill in that slot for her (no lewd imagery intended).
Of course, this leads us into the very dangerous realm of pretending to not 'just want a girlfriend' so as to fool girls into wanting you. This is often transparent. Also, someone who has a huge vacuum in their life is going to come across as desperate, anxious, needy and emotionally unstable. These are not attractive qualities. The best way to find someone is to be content with yourself as you are, and not 'want someone.' wanting a particular person is ok, but just wanting someone, an undetermined person, anyone, in your life to fill the vacuum is going to lead to disappointment.
Or, one could just not worry about it and take what life gives you.
I think the world of romantic attraction only has to be tricky, convoluted and adversarial if one endeavors to make it out that way.
This was originally posted on goatse.cx or one of its affiliates, but has since been taken down. It now only appears on goatse.info and geekculture.dk, according to google's index. In the interests of internet cultural preservation, I will mirror it here. In a week or so, my site will be added to those that contain the google search terms 'spock fagged kirk maniac,' an elite club indeed.
One day Captain Kirk was maiming his cock with a horseshoe when suddenly Mr. Spock ran up to him and shoved his pointy ear up his butt. "What is this for!" the fag captain said. "FAGS FOR YOU AALL!L!!!" the ancient alien howled as suddenly he farted and Captain Kirk twirled around in a daze and his foreskin twisted and his kidney stones turned into wooden beads. He pulled out his pistol and shot lasers at his chastity belt and suddenly he hurdled his dick into Captain Kirk"s bellybutton and it tore his flesh while Spock fucked his stomach. Kirk hollered out loud and Mr. Spock threw his shoes to the floor and wrinkled his penis until Kirk bellowed out to make it stop. A maelstom of shit whizzed around the ship and suddenly a giant fag appeared out side and the U.S.S. Enterprise went up his butt. "Oh what the hell have you gotten us into NOW!" Captain Kirk said as he oozed a condom back on his dick and put his panties back on. "OOH!H!!!!!!" Mr. Spock started fucking him again and shoved his phazer up his butt. He dissolved his glands and exploded his turds and finally a queer klingon hurdled through the door and smashed Kirk with his butt hairs. A maniac sucked his dick and suddenly Mr. Spock fagged Kirk so hard that his intestines burst open and he died.
I would suggest reading wikipedia articles on trolling and shock sites to get a better idea of what's going on here.
My cousin molly is visiting for a few days before going back to school, and yesterday I took her on a driving tour.
We started in seneca park, where we walked a short ways into the woods on the lakeside path, and watched geese flying over clopper lake from a peninsular vista. Next stop was a fruit stand near poolesville, which was closed. But the drive was a pretty one, and gave us a good sense of the central Maryland countryside. Here were the kind of people who thought nothing of refurbishing a barn, just for the fun of it. As I told molly, a good warning flag of excess disposable income is the tendency to refurbish barns when one is not a farmer. We drove through poolesville, a small Maryland town with a reputation for quaintness, and ended up at white's ferry, which still transports cars between the Maryland and Virginia sides of the potomac river. After sitting on the grass, watching the ferry operate, and snapping a few pictures, we drove through darnestown, north potomac and potomac into washington DC, entering the district in the tenleytown/american university area, via river road.
We drove all the way down into georgetown, around and about the townhouses in the crook of wisconsin avenue and M street, and eventually down to the waterfront, where for some unfathomable reason we found a parking spot, and were able to walk around. We took K street to 14th street, and drove in the downtown direction, where we scuttled around randomly in the dupont circle/adams morgan/u-street corridor areas before somehow ending up on connecticut avenue. We took this all the way out of DC to chevy chase and then kensington, where I showed molly my dad's house, and then took a shortcut through his neighborhood to wheaton, my haunt for 2 months or so in 1997. We ate a very late dinner, I showed her my old house on finley street, and then we drove back to gaithersburg via rockville pike, passing through old town gaithersburg.
It was a good driving tour of the DC-Maryland area, I thought. Even though we covered a lot of ground, I would have liked to have taken molly into northeast DC to show her the towing lots, police stations, tenements, and junk-yards, since most of our tour (all of our tour, really) was concentrated on rich people and the stuff they buy, principally their attractive real estate. Also, I avoided the really distastefully suburban areas of gaithersburg, like the kentlands and the strip malls. The nature of the gaithersburg area was clearer to me after our tour: big, wide, fast roads that stretch five miles or so before intersecting with one another, at which point there is invariably a collection of strip malls.